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In Chapter 4, "Note To Self", of my book, "Hard Work Is Heart Work", I tell you how a picture of my baby boy and I brought me to tears as an adult and made me write the young girl staring back in the photo an apology letter.

 

The thing is that in this letter, I didn't write to her about what others did because that would only provide an excuse not to face the past.  Instead, I apologized to her about what I refused to do for myself and how I treated myself in spite of being assaulted, abused, emotionally traumatized, impoverished, misunderstood, broken into pieces, and on the verge of a nervous breakdown at only 18 years old.

 

To whom much is given, much is required and I figured out why bad things happen to good people.  It's because we come to earth packed up with so much of the good stuff that opposing forces join together in hopes of making us believe that we aren't who we are, don't have what we have, or will give up and quit from being too tired to fight any longer.

 

I always feel like we were very ill prepared for what life really is and that that's the reason we are so flabbergasted when the time comes to face your enemy and your "inner-me".  Only the truth can help us prepare, endure, and come back from the impact of life's hard blows.  For some reason, there's this strange idea floating around that if we have great skill, talent, and ability (or even looks) that we are exempt from being tested like crash test dummies in an auto factory.  The fact is that if we have great skill, talent, ability AND we are aware of it, none of those skills, talents, and abilities show up until the real you is tired of being pushed into the wall.... tired losing fights, tired of trying to win on someone else's terms, and is ready to settle the score in your own way!  Your own way requires that YOU be YOU but, the price for choosing to stop believing and agreeing with those opposing forces always starts in the pocket of your heart.

Unpacking the good stuff you came to earth with brings love and hate at the same time and if you're not careful in making sure that you know who you are and who you are not, you'll be too busy going up and down everyone else's emotional rollercoaster instead of remaining unchanged by the strange™.

 

The best part of you is still breathing and ready to live despite the blows of life.  The only way you'll win is with a shovel, which represents your gifts, talents, and abilities.

Bury "IT"... not you and if you need some help shaking the dirt off, email me at info@nzingajackson.com, but in the meantime, what's your Aha! Moment??! 

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